BGAN is creating incoherent movie ramblings, mostly. Also videos of things.
1

patron

$92
per month
Hello, you gorgeous gaggle of growlers, you! This here? This is my place to essentially beg you all for money in a somewhat shameless manner. Not to say you won't get anything out of it, as I do have some perks if you're willing to drop the right amount.

Now, for the uninitiated or the new visitors to my particular brand of nonsense, let me lay it out plainly. I'm a movie critic who takes most things with the largest grain of salt imaginable. Like, so large it could crush us all to death. Imagine the horrified screams as salty death comes down upon the hopeless masses. They all look up, wishing for some kind of hero to save them. Isn't that lovely? Anyway, I talk about movies. Bad movies, mostly, but I generally cover whichever films spark my fancy or are required for me to cover by obligation. In truth though, I see myself mostly as an entertainer. I'm here to make you smile, snicker, guffaw, bwahahaha, and generally chuckle so hard that you toss your unguarded young into a wood-chipper due to a lack of being able to control your body from said laughter.

I also talk about other things in the geek purview such as comics, games, and toys. At the behest of others, I have even started recording myself playing games for my YouTube channel. Some people hate me for my views, some love me for them, and others just love watching me poke at angry bears until they blindly maul themselves.
Tiers
Almost Secret Stuff and Things!
$1 or more per month 0 patrons
I will name one of my chest hairs after you. Also you get to have access to private posts here where I offer updates and polls for upcoming stuff.
Feed the Beast
$5 or more per month 0 patrons
You get to request anything you want and I will cover it. Whether it be a movie, a game, a book, a show, an album, a toy, or a food. You also get to pick whether I do so in written form or via a video.
Diddle Them Doodles
$5 or more per month 0 of 10 patrons
I will mail you a doodle, because I love you and you're helping me survive.
Positive Reinforcement
$10 or more per month 0 patrons
I will prepare a inspirational photo of myself made especially for you and give you a shout out on the blog. Yes, I will even link your website, Twitter, Instagram, etc. if you supply those.
Burning That Dog Poo
$50 or more per month 0 patrons
I will buy a copy of a terrible thing I have reviewed (of your choice from my reviewed material) and record myself burning it (literally setting on fire), then verbally thank you for making that ritual possible.
For All You Furries Out There
$100 or more per month 0 of 1 patrons
I will put on my nicest attire and go on a Skype date with you. You can ask me whatever you please and I will be as charming as possible via a digital platform. If you're an internet ghost, I promise not to wear red.
Goals
$92 of $300 per month
Being able to afford tickets to go see all these bloody movies. It would also allow me to afford proper editing software again, which would hopefully mean better videos. Every little bit helps and I could use a little help.
1 of 2
Hello, you gorgeous gaggle of growlers, you! This here? This is my place to essentially beg you all for money in a somewhat shameless manner. Not to say you won't get anything out of it, as I do have some perks if you're willing to drop the right amount.

Now, for the uninitiated or the new visitors to my particular brand of nonsense, let me lay it out plainly. I'm a movie critic who takes most things with the largest grain of salt imaginable. Like, so large it could crush us all to death. Imagine the horrified screams as salty death comes down upon the hopeless masses. They all look up, wishing for some kind of hero to save them. Isn't that lovely? Anyway, I talk about movies. Bad movies, mostly, but I generally cover whichever films spark my fancy or are required for me to cover by obligation. In truth though, I see myself mostly as an entertainer. I'm here to make you smile, snicker, guffaw, bwahahaha, and generally chuckle so hard that you toss your unguarded young into a wood-chipper due to a lack of being able to control your body from said laughter.

I also talk about other things in the geek purview such as comics, games, and toys. At the behest of others, I have even started recording myself playing games for my YouTube channel. Some people hate me for my views, some love me for them, and others just love watching me poke at angry bears until they blindly maul themselves.

Recent posts by BGAN

Tiers
Almost Secret Stuff and Things!
$1 or more per month 0 patrons
I will name one of my chest hairs after you. Also you get to have access to private posts here where I offer updates and polls for upcoming stuff.
Feed the Beast
$5 or more per month 0 patrons
You get to request anything you want and I will cover it. Whether it be a movie, a game, a book, a show, an album, a toy, or a food. You also get to pick whether I do so in written form or via a video.
Diddle Them Doodles
$5 or more per month 0 of 10 patrons
I will mail you a doodle, because I love you and you're helping me survive.
Positive Reinforcement
$10 or more per month 0 patrons
I will prepare a inspirational photo of myself made especially for you and give you a shout out on the blog. Yes, I will even link your website, Twitter, Instagram, etc. if you supply those.
Burning That Dog Poo
$50 or more per month 0 patrons
I will buy a copy of a terrible thing I have reviewed (of your choice from my reviewed material) and record myself burning it (literally setting on fire), then verbally thank you for making that ritual possible.
For All You Furries Out There
$100 or more per month 0 of 1 patrons
I will put on my nicest attire and go on a Skype date with you. You can ask me whatever you please and I will be as charming as possible via a digital platform. If you're an internet ghost, I promise not to wear red.