Leaping Larry L

is creating The Leapster's Bugle

69

patrons

About


GRACIOUS MESSAGE FROM STINKING PROPRIETOR


This is a bit of an update on how the Leapster's Bugle page is doing, and what needs to change to keep it doing better. 

(For those new to the page, or just peculiarly nostalgic for the abundantly familiar, the usual introductory spiel follows just below this.)

From the stats accumulated by Patreon's own analysis gizmo, the good news is that the numbers for the posts (and thus presumably listenership for the podcasts) are pretty healthy.

I'm still hoping for improvement over time - with some word of mouth, and hopefully me figuring a useful way to promote the shows to more people who would be interested, beyond the couple of antisocial media platforms I use now - but they're in the low hundreds now, probably averaging 160-odd with the bigger ones spiking up well above that. 

So that's good.



SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE - SUBSCRIBE


What is interesting - by which I mean provoking a response triangulated by dismay, despair and that kind of jadedness that comes with a 'what can you do?' weary/idiot grin attached - is that looking at the raw numbers for each post/show/podcast, hardly any of the people coming here are subscribers.

If their figures are right, it's well under 1% on any given podcast or post on Leapster's Bugle who are subscribers.


I've got no way of gauging how accurate those numbers are, but if that's anything vaguely in the ballpark of accuracy, that's the exact way I don't need this web page to work.


SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE - SUBSCRIBE (Again)


After I was jettisoned from the pro media space station, the only work I could get was none or vile, and then after the vile stuff dried up, it was none. 

I'm an old guy. Apparently nobody wants to employ those. I'm not kidding. I can't get a gig stacking supermarket shelves, in a call centre, and if there was a job licking supermarket car parks clean, I've got a shrewd feeling based on a container-load of precedent, that they'd be looking for a younger kind of asphalt-licker.


If I'm good at anything, I'm good at two things - writing stuff and doing radio.
Since I got the goodbye-kick-in-old-arso from the newspaper in late 2017, no-one is even the slightest bit interested in employing me in these areas.

I could have, as the old Charles Atlas ad on the backs of thousands of comics used to say, "Dry up and blow away" but I thought I should employ me in those areas., if no-one else would. 

My stuff has always been polarising - it meant nothing to some folks, or they detested it, but plenty of others, whether over the air or in print, really seemed to like it. Numbers, when available, always suggested they did.

To my mind, I never got any worse at doing either radio shows or writing humour columns, or whatever you'd call them. 

I don't get to say whether what I produce is funny or any good, but I feel comfortable enough saying that what I do, how I do it, and the mix of subject matters treated in the way I treat them, you're not going to get somewhere else. 

If you want it to continue, and you've got the bucks, please subscribe.


SUBLIMINAL MYSTERY AND MAGIC - SUBSCRIBE ALREADY


The web page with the radio shows people call podcasts now, and the odd text piece, this is me trying to somehow make a living, or part of one. Let's not be ambiguous about this. In fact, as Mrs Slocombe used to observe on the TV landmark that was Are You Being Served, "I am UNANIMOUS in this."

I'm willing to put more shows up, in fact that would be absolutely jake-spiffy-fandango with me, whatever that means precisely. 

But I know me. If there's no incentive because people are happy to pop by for a freebie, but not to pay anything - and the rates are basically as low as you want them to be - I'd feel like I was working for nothing, and, inevitably, I'd stop doing it over time.

My plan is to take it from the 1-2 or so shows per week I average now to 3-4. 

I'll still put some text stuff up from time to time too.

But if you come here and you derive some degree of entertainment, I need you, if you've got the money to kick in a little to subscribe.

The minimum amount is USD $1 per month (the Patreon website is US-based, and they choose to do business in US currency) or if you can swing it and you like the stuff enough, you can go to USD $2/month, USD $5/month or whatever. 

You cancel or continue as you want.

I think it's a fair deal. You may well think I'm hallucinating. I think I can see the point.

But if you like what you hear and see via my page, and you haven't already, please kick in, and help to keep it rolling along.

                                                        ARRIBA!


                                                                         Leaping Larry L

____________________________________________________________________________





This is the web plague of Leaping Larry L, a short, portly mammal found in South-Eastern Australia.

You may remember Leaping Larry L as a presenter on a number of radio shows, many of them on 3RRR-FM, or as a nominally satirical opinion writer for sport, media and other sections of The Age, which at one time was a Melbourne newspaper. 

When the paying media work dried up, Leapster decided, in spite of public demand, to continue his idiosyncratic alternative to humour via this very outlet.

Thanks to the generosity of people like you - or people who may in fact be you - Leaping Larry L continues to this day to hurl written stuff out into the ether on the off-chance.

Patreon allows subscriptions for as little as $1 a month. If you can afford it and like the stuff you read here, $2 and $5 are other great numbers.* In fact, let's just pause a moment and appreciate their numerical beauty.

Bigger numbers than those are also lovely if you happen to have developed a whopping surplus of leisure funds and/or a slight leak in the head.


All contributions are received with genuine and astounded gratitude by Unca Leapster, i.e. me.

____________________________________________________________________________

(* In the interest of fairness, I should point out that the numbers are in $US as Patreon is a US website, so you'll be charged $1US or $5US, or whatever your chosen monthly subscription rate is.
I also like using the expression "in the interest of fairness" due to a running gag on the WWE's old pro wrestling TV shows which ran that whenever the company's boss, Vince McMahon, appeared on the shows and used that expression, it meant that the opposite of fairness was about to take place.)

____________________________________________________________________________


Goals
0% complete
When I reach (little finger cocked to mouth) One Billion Dollars, I will consider passing out cheap souvenir ballpoint pens to all active patrons.

(What this means translated freely back from the original Western Gibberish, is that I don't care to publicly list a target amount I'm aiming at - which is the information the site thinks should go here, and I guess it's relevant to many of its contributors - because I don't really want to set a limit on it, and also the risk of any limit stated looking either delusional or flat-out insane. I'm basically knocked out if anyone supports my page.)
1 of 1
By becoming a patron, you'll instantly unlock access to 6 exclusive posts
6
Writings
By becoming a patron, you'll instantly unlock access to 6 exclusive posts
6
Writings

Recent posts by Leaping Larry L

How it works

Get started in 2 minutes

Choose a membership
Sign up
Add a payment method
Get benefits