Cat Marnell


Select a membership level


Limited (1 remaining)
reward item
reward item
per month
The classic BEAUTYSHAMBLES subscription: the essential longform  columns delivered to your inbox either once or twice per week (I'm keeping this flexible; it's the same wordcount in the end either way). This is a great option!
  • Complete post archive


reward item
reward item
per month
RECOMMENDED TIER. I detest editors who tell you to buy overpriced stuff and act like they're so great at their jobs. The editor in chief of Beautyshambles, ME, will never do that: this tier will include clothing and home decor picks which will NEVER BE EXPENSIVE and will ALWAYS BE DOPE. I'll show you what I'm buying—the $7 poster that will make your apartment 10x cooler in three seconds, or the edgiest sweatpants on the internet... For my true old school fans, you also get my "lost" xoJane columns, reposted, with behind the scenes commentary and insight into what was really going on!  As I said, I definitely RECOMMEND this tier and not EVEN because I am particularly greedy for your extra dollar...Yes, I said EDGY sweatpants.
  • Patron-only Q&As
  • Complete post archive


Limited (2 remaining)
reward item
reward item
per month
*UPDATED! One call every 8 weeks until we shrink this group!* Crazy Patreon has suggested the phone call thing and--YOLO. For $17 a month, you get everything else in the other tiers AND I will call you. (After we do the call, you can move down to the $6 tier.)  We will build an intimate long-term relationship accordingly.
  • Patron-only Q&As
  • Complete post archive
  • Phone call

About Cat Marnell



What up though! It's me, CAT MARNELL, New York Times Bestselling author and former "beauty editor who smoked crack" (thanks, Telegraph).

I'm the former beauty director of and was the associate beauty editor at Lucky magazine. I also worked in the beauty departments at Glamour, Teen Vogue, and NY/LON. 

I am thus wildly qualified to introduce you to my new subscription beauty column, BEAUTYSHAMBLES! 

(Thanks for the inspiration as always, Pete Doherty.)

But of course—because the only thing more boring than reading stories about women and the beauty products they love is writing stories like that—nothing is ever *just* beauty with me

So while these are my new "beauty" columns, they are also a peek inside my world.

If enjoyed my memoir HOW TO MURDER YOUR LIFE, or if you liked my reign of terror tenure at xoJane, or even if you miss my crazy VICE column "Amphetamine Logic", this is the place for you. 

BEAUTYSHAMBLES is gonna be—as noted above—not just a place where I tell you my beauty secrets, but also an ALTERNATIVE LIFESTYLE guide. I'm living in downtown New York City again now, but recently I've visited nearly 70 countries and explored the coolest cities on earth: London, Paris, Tokyo, Antwerp, Berlin, Milan, Rome, Tblisi, Basel, Lisbon, and so many more.

I'm going to tell you how I did it cheaply—and take you everywhere that I went. The initial columns will be VERY travel-heavy... as I have lots of stuff to share with you from the past few years.

Eventually, as I continue to settle back into New York City, I'll also take you inside my life there again. I'll show you the clothes I wear, how I decorate my apartment (as soon as I stop living out of hotels and Air Bnbs), and so much more.

Of course, l will be taking you to some crazy f-ing parties! You know me...

BEAUTYSHAMBLES is not a podcast—it's writing—but it will follow a podcast subscription model. You will receive an email alert when I post my column(s). 

It took me a LONG time to come around to the Patreon thing, by the way.

Dudes. I'm old school. I DETEST paywalls. I read ONLY what's free to me on the Internet.

So I understand if this is unappealing to some of you.


You can always cancel, and because I feel so creepy about charging people, I promise you I will obsess over the quality of my content.

(Which I do anyway.)

And! By self-publishing on Patreon, I actually can just DO WHATEVER I WANT TO DO: no editors to approve or disapprove of my ideas and photos; no websites for whom I'll have to censor myself or with which I will have to "fit in".


So—like I said—it's gonna be good.

I love you guys and SO APPRECIATE your support over the years. It continues to blows my mind.

Please subscribe...and let's get started!!


P.S. People hit me up all the time asking for links to my old xoJane columns, which no longer live on the internet. So by popular demand, I'm putting my old xoJane columns "back" online by re-writing them, word by word...then publishing them here. We can re-visit them together with some updated commentary and insight a few times a month. Check out my tiers!

Become a patron to

Unlock 11 exclusive posts
Listen anywhere
Connect via private message

Recent posts by Cat Marnell

How it works

Get started in 2 minutes

Choose a membership
Sign up
Add a payment method
Get benefits