Chicken Cannonballs is creating an average humor column.
4

patrons

$4
per month
Hello there! My name is Brandt Ketterer. I'm a marketing copywriter by trade and a trail runner, mountain climber, and humor writer by hobby. I grew up in Brazil near Manaus, Amazonas. These days I live in Leadville, Colorado, America.

This page is no longer being updated. I pretty much use Steemit exclusively now. You can find me here: https://steemit.com/@brandt

Old stuff:

Chicken Cannonballs is my creative outlet for writing about whatever I think is funny. The articles I post aren't necessarily related to each other, and I don't hold myself to one particular writing style. I do try to keep everything as average as possible, though.

Before you become my patron, I recommend checking out some of my public posts. If you like those, then you'll probably like the patron-only posts, too.

Thanks very much for your interest and support!

P.S. If you're wondering how I came up with the name Chicken Cannonballs, you'll have to become a patron and read this.

P.P.S. I have other creative outlets, too. You can learn more about them by visiting my website.

Rewards
Grade B
$1.99 or more per month 2 patrons
Howdy, potential patron! Here's what the Grade B reward gets you:


  • Access to all of my patron-only posts.
  • The hidden wisdom and secret power behind the origins of my name, Chicken Cannonballs.
Grade A
$9.99 or more per month 0 patrons
Oh, hello there, better potential patron! Grade A gets you all of the wonderful things described in Grade B, plus the following:


  • The option to pitch ideas to me and have me think about writing them up.
  • The official Chicken Cannonballs pencil. Good for writing your own humor articles and driving me out of business.
Grade AA
$49.99 or more per month 0 of 10 patrons
Greetings, best potential patron of them all! Grade AA gets you all of the wonderful things described in Grade A, plus the following:


  • The official Chicken Cannonballs bookmark. Good for marking your spot in books I didn't write.
  • Guaranteed publication of your pitch on Chicken Cannonballs. Your idea, my writing style.
  • No stupid ideas allowed.
  • I get to decide what is or is not stupid.
Goals
$4 of $800 per month
When I reach this goal, I will apply to rent one of the tiny studio apartments at 16th and Poplar in Leadville, Colorado. I will plan to live there for a month, during which time I'll write an article for Chicken Cannonballs about my tiny studio experience.



^^ That's what the apartments look like. Yep, it costs $800/month to rent one of those pasty yellow shanties. Featuring: doors that probably lock! Welcome to Leadville.
3 of 3
Hello there! My name is Brandt Ketterer. I'm a marketing copywriter by trade and a trail runner, mountain climber, and humor writer by hobby. I grew up in Brazil near Manaus, Amazonas. These days I live in Leadville, Colorado, America.

This page is no longer being updated. I pretty much use Steemit exclusively now. You can find me here: https://steemit.com/@brandt

Old stuff:

Chicken Cannonballs is my creative outlet for writing about whatever I think is funny. The articles I post aren't necessarily related to each other, and I don't hold myself to one particular writing style. I do try to keep everything as average as possible, though.

Before you become my patron, I recommend checking out some of my public posts. If you like those, then you'll probably like the patron-only posts, too.

Thanks very much for your interest and support!

P.S. If you're wondering how I came up with the name Chicken Cannonballs, you'll have to become a patron and read this.

P.P.S. I have other creative outlets, too. You can learn more about them by visiting my website.

Recent posts by Chicken Cannonballs

Rewards
Grade B
$1.99 or more per month 2 patrons
Howdy, potential patron! Here's what the Grade B reward gets you:


  • Access to all of my patron-only posts.
  • The hidden wisdom and secret power behind the origins of my name, Chicken Cannonballs.
Grade A
$9.99 or more per month 0 patrons
Oh, hello there, better potential patron! Grade A gets you all of the wonderful things described in Grade B, plus the following:


  • The option to pitch ideas to me and have me think about writing them up.
  • The official Chicken Cannonballs pencil. Good for writing your own humor articles and driving me out of business.
Grade AA
$49.99 or more per month 0 of 10 patrons
Greetings, best potential patron of them all! Grade AA gets you all of the wonderful things described in Grade A, plus the following:


  • The official Chicken Cannonballs bookmark. Good for marking your spot in books I didn't write.
  • Guaranteed publication of your pitch on Chicken Cannonballs. Your idea, my writing style.
  • No stupid ideas allowed.
  • I get to decide what is or is not stupid.