Elle Michael River

is creating weird, messy stories about weird, messy people

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One Cup of Coffee
reward item
per month
  • A one-time thank you message
  • A bi-weekly Writing Prompt
  • Access to my Patreon Blog 24 hours before the public
  • Knowledge of a well-caffeinated Elle
Two Cups of Coffee
reward item
per month
  • Access to a Monthly Writer Q&A
  • (Very) Occasional Behind-The-Scenes Drafts/Doodles
  • Knowledge of an extremely well-caffeinated Elle
  • And everything in the previous tiers
Three Cups of Coffee
Limited (9 remaining)
reward item
per month
  • A monthly, 20-minute video coaching & editing session
  • Your Name/Business Added To My Website Support Page
  • Knowledge of a seeing-through-space-and-time, well-caffeinated Elle
  • And everything in the previous tiers


Hi, I'm Elle.

I write fiction and perform heart surgery on manuscripts missing their souls. I run exclusively on hazelnut coffee, fluffy cats, and an unbridled weirdness some might call creativity.

But I'd love to tell you a story.

I write about weird, messy people doing weird messy things. If you're looking for noble heroes, pristine princesses, or stories where people don't say "SHIT PUPPIES" when they stub their toes, this isn't the place for you. I practice radical self-acceptance, and so do all my flawed, diverse characters. 

So... What Is This Place?

This is my Patreon: an unfiltered space--sorry, a fucking unfiltered space-- for all my midnight monologues, happy hour ramblings, and maybe some erratic inspiration. My work as a writer fuels my soul but doesn't always pay the electric bill. By subscribing to my Patreon, you can access extra content such as:

  • Access my Patreon Blog 24 hours before the public
  • A monthly Writing Uncensored blog (okay, it's a rant)
  • A bi-weekly writing prompt
  • A monthly Writer Q&A
  • A 20-minute video editing session (limited)
You can also choose to support my writing with a generous monthly donation and have your name or business listed on my website's support page and in my monthly newsletter. 

How Does My Support Help You?

As a freelancer and writing teacher, every penny counts, and I will not be able to dedicate the time I need to write all the stories rattling around in my brain without your help.

In return for your support, I'm turning off my good-girl filter, maybe even disabling spellcheck (risky, I know), and offering my unedited nonsense as a muse to all my readers, writers, and friends. Specifically, your support goes to:

  • Subscription fees for job sites
  • Website domain fees and design
  • Subscription fees for industry magazines and calls for submissions
  • Hiring a proofreader for my manuscript
  • Subscription fees for writing software such as MS Word 365, Scrivener, Grammarly, etc.
  • Maintenence fees for my equipment such as laptop, webcam, phone, and internet
  • Student loans for my MFA and BA
  • My goddamn mortgage

Where Can I Read More of Your Work? Hire You?

My website! It collects my writing from all over the web. Visit it here: www.ellemichaelriver.com I also dump a lot of undercooked ideas on Twitter, share pictures of my cat on Instagram, and I have a really boring Facebook page that I sometimes update with memes and articles.

Need a writer? A manuscript surgeon? Check out my portfolio for all my services.

35% complete
If I reach $100 per month, I'll start a monthly, throw-back video book review for two cups of coffee where I review classic stories and tell you my uncensored thoughts!
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By becoming a patron, you'll instantly unlock access to 10 exclusive posts
By becoming a patron, you'll instantly unlock access to 10 exclusive posts

Recent posts by Elle Michael River

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