Encraplopedia is creating a conversation about cr%ppy families
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We Andy and Kim.

As children, we were frequently verbally and physically abused, shamed and humiliated, and our adult relationship with parents has always been strained. We were 36 and 23 when things hit the rock bottom. We could no longer accept the abuse, but our parents refused to change, and the more we insisted on a respectful discourse the more vicious they became. We uncovered that we had been lied to, manipulated, and pitted against each other by those we trusted most—our parents. We had always sensed something was not quite right, but we were astonished to learn just how wrong everything had been.

Why Encraplopedia?

Our family would not hesitate to destroy us, emotionally, financially and even physically rather than have an honest conversation. We loved them, and we couldn’t understand their actions. We wanted a family, and it was destroying us. We felt like orphans. We were devastated. Yet when we shared with friends, we felt disbelieved and judged. At best, people responded with platitudes such as you can’t pick your family, you only have one set of parents, etc.. And we found we were not alone: this is a common experience among those whose family has turned on them.

Not all families are nice and not all victims of family abuse are children. Many of us won’t admit even to ourselves that we have abusive parents, and the abuse continues into adulthood, undisclosed. Your friend may have been sex-shamed by her father and so humiliated she won’t tell anyone. Your father-in-law may take an occasional swing at your wife. Yet we long for that sense of familial belonging and put up with the abuse. And when we have had enough, not only do we face our family’s wrath but also society’s.

Our society puts family values above all others and speaking ill of one’s parents is considered sacrilege. By making the topic a taboo, we pressure victims to remain silent simply because our abusers gave birth to us.

With Encraplopedia, we hope to start a small but important change. Because the cr%p some families put us through deserves an encyclopedia.

We believe that:

Being connected by blood ties does not grant anyone the licence to physically intimidate, verbally abuse, or shame us, publicly or in private. Neither does it afford infinite forgiveness, especially without apology or remorse. Our parents are not entitled to have a say in our lives or to be in them: family is a privilege, not a right, and as we earn our place in someone’s life so must everyone earn their place in ours, related or not.

Why join us on Patreon?

For us and many other “parented orphans”, it is a life-long journey. We decided to share ours, one post at a time, in the hope it may help someone find the strength to carry on. By supporting us on Patreon, you enable us to continue making such posts.

On joining, you will get access to our Patron-exclusive Discord server where you can discuss early previews of our posts, give us your feedback, or simply chat, share your experiences and get advice. And we get a way to connect with you and hear what you have to say.

Thank you for your support.

Andy and Kim
Tiers
See No Evil
$5 or more per month

Get a discord role!

Hear No Evil
$15 or more per month

Get a discord role and early previews.

Speak No Evil
$25 or more per month

Get all the benefits for the previous tiers and a place in the Encraplopedia Hall of Fame.

Goals
$0 of $250 per month
We will publish a blog post at least every four weeks.
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We Andy and Kim.

As children, we were frequently verbally and physically abused, shamed and humiliated, and our adult relationship with parents has always been strained. We were 36 and 23 when things hit the rock bottom. We could no longer accept the abuse, but our parents refused to change, and the more we insisted on a respectful discourse the more vicious they became. We uncovered that we had been lied to, manipulated, and pitted against each other by those we trusted most—our parents. We had always sensed something was not quite right, but we were astonished to learn just how wrong everything had been.

Why Encraplopedia?

Our family would not hesitate to destroy us, emotionally, financially and even physically rather than have an honest conversation. We loved them, and we couldn’t understand their actions. We wanted a family, and it was destroying us. We felt like orphans. We were devastated. Yet when we shared with friends, we felt disbelieved and judged. At best, people responded with platitudes such as you can’t pick your family, you only have one set of parents, etc.. And we found we were not alone: this is a common experience among those whose family has turned on them.

Not all families are nice and not all victims of family abuse are children. Many of us won’t admit even to ourselves that we have abusive parents, and the abuse continues into adulthood, undisclosed. Your friend may have been sex-shamed by her father and so humiliated she won’t tell anyone. Your father-in-law may take an occasional swing at your wife. Yet we long for that sense of familial belonging and put up with the abuse. And when we have had enough, not only do we face our family’s wrath but also society’s.

Our society puts family values above all others and speaking ill of one’s parents is considered sacrilege. By making the topic a taboo, we pressure victims to remain silent simply because our abusers gave birth to us.

With Encraplopedia, we hope to start a small but important change. Because the cr%p some families put us through deserves an encyclopedia.

We believe that:

Being connected by blood ties does not grant anyone the licence to physically intimidate, verbally abuse, or shame us, publicly or in private. Neither does it afford infinite forgiveness, especially without apology or remorse. Our parents are not entitled to have a say in our lives or to be in them: family is a privilege, not a right, and as we earn our place in someone’s life so must everyone earn their place in ours, related or not.

Why join us on Patreon?

For us and many other “parented orphans”, it is a life-long journey. We decided to share ours, one post at a time, in the hope it may help someone find the strength to carry on. By supporting us on Patreon, you enable us to continue making such posts.

On joining, you will get access to our Patron-exclusive Discord server where you can discuss early previews of our posts, give us your feedback, or simply chat, share your experiences and get advice. And we get a way to connect with you and hear what you have to say.

Thank you for your support.

Andy and Kim

Recent posts by Encraplopedia

Tiers
See No Evil
$5 or more per month

Get a discord role!

Hear No Evil
$15 or more per month

Get a discord role and early previews.

Speak No Evil
$25 or more per month

Get all the benefits for the previous tiers and a place in the Encraplopedia Hall of Fame.