Ian Boldsworth is creating Infinite Hermit Productions
835

patrons

Hello there. How are you? Me, I am fine.

Anyway, it was only a matter of time before this became a thing, and your main job is going to be proving me wrong in my assertion that it’s a bad move. Although if you don't prove me wrong I will REALLY sulk. I have argued over Patreon for about two years now, and I have finally run out of excuses.

If you don’t know what Patreon is (if you do then you can skip this paragraph, although you may be risking missing a brilliant joke), then it is a platform where creators (me) can fund their work directly with their audience (you). You pledge to make a monthly payment (some people do it per item, but that would bankrupt you with this page) to fund the creator’s independent work. It is up to you how much you wish to pledge. Some of this work will still be available to the genuine public, but patrons will get it earlier, and some of it will only be available to patrons. Sorry there was no joke in the paragraph.

You may know that I have been creating online content in a variety of forms and guises since 2007, and that I’ve slowly shifted all my creative output to this method. You can find out all about this at ianboldsworth.co.uk, but it wasn’t until 2015 that I had the courage/front to attempt to monetise it, with the rewards based donations system of The ParaPod Podcast. I then got cocky and tried it again with The Mental Podcast, but for my next project I am struggling to see how that can be a thing. To be perfectly honest I am struggling with my next project full stop, as I appear to be having a, some would say long overdue, crisis of confidence. Actually, crisis might be a bit strong, but it isn’t charging into my work portfolio as quickly or confidently as previous stuff.

The project is called 4000 Words and is an ongoing podcast series of short stories and I’ve presently written 4.5 of them which is pathetic (my target for now was 20). Now, this Patreon is not going to be exclusively for that, but it is my main starting point. It occurred to me that in all my previous work I have rarely been transparent about the actual creative process until after the event, and even then only on a very basic level. There is something about the Patreon format however, which – I think – might facilitate that.

I am basically allowing you in on the creating bit, you’ll get everything before everyone else, including the RSS for the demo recordings of the stories as they arrive (I suspect some of these will end up being the final released episodes). My plan, such as it is, is to write on Patreon pretty much every day, be it blog posts, bits of the stories (you’ll definitely be getting the stuff I end up binning too), just a stream of the process. This is how I’ll fund 4000 Words. There’ll be audio blog posts, even if that’s me just grabbing the guitar and singing a song before bedtime (I have made up my own chords and manipulate them for every song, you’ll spot that quick), and posts about other projects including The ParaPod Movie and The Mental Podcast 2 (another one languishing in development hell, but there is a reason for that).

Look, I am basically letting you in on the stuff that I only usually show to friends. I’ve only got about four friends, so maybe my Patreon is you paying to be my friend. Maybe I should be paying you. I am being facetious of course, but genuinely, I am really tired of Twitter, and it’s vague, weird, living your life in public feel, and I think this is potentially a way for me to overshare in the same way I sometimes do on Twitter, but without the cloak of mystery. On the work front, I like the symbiotic thing between audience and creator that has been present in all my work, it’s the main reason I’ve avoided sponsorship on stuff – I don’t want to feel that I’m selling you out. So, I am finally prostituting my art, but directly to the audience.

The posts will start the second just one person pledges and will continue until you have all shook your heads and walked away. I need to go and think of some tiers now. And they keep telling me to do a video.  That’s going to throw my ego into crisis.

Thanks for reading, thanks for the support (with or without pledging – but people that pledge are MORE SPECIAL TO ME)

IB xxx
ianboldsworth.co.uk
Tiers
Skinflints
$1 or more per month
I'd rather you just threw it in a field.  A sarcastic pledge that is.
Non-Commitals
$5 or more per month
Look.  I do appreciate that.  It's going to look awful if it's just you pledging but if there's a few of you then that's not so bad. But just so you know I have monthly outgoings of £40 that are just to charities and I get NOTHING back from them.  But I don't talk about it. I'm actually trying to work out the best way to cancel some of the direct debits without them noticing.  Probably do it at Christmas when people are giving more to them.
Kindly Folk
$10 or more per month
Ok, that is actually kind.  Now we are getting to the point where I do appreciate it properly and I feel a bit bad about getting cross with the lower tiers.  That might be all they can afford and I shouldn't shout at them. But I do prefer you.
Middle Class
$20 or more per month
No I prefer you now. Although it is a bit dependant on what you actually make.  Like, if you are a millionaire then you have no business slumming it in this tier, but for normal people I would say that is well generous and I would actually phone you up.  I'm not even messing. Only for about ten minutes but what a five minutes that would be. We'd have a right laugh in that two minutes.
Ultras
$50 or more per month
I'll give you my email address.  I honestly will. You will get the most direct way of contacting me in real life and I almost always reply to emails eventually. I'll deffo reply to the first one. Hang on, you're only going to do it for one month aren't you?
Ultra Plus
$75 or more per month
I don't think anyone can afford this.  Thing is, I know most of my fans.  They haven't got money like that. I'll be honest, my descriptions are just making me laugh at the moment so I keep adding more.  Although weirdly for this one I am starting to think I should add something genuine.  You'll obviously get my email address and I'll obviously phone you up, but what else? Skype or something? My internet is poor but we can give it a go? (NO KISSING)
Official friend of Ian in real life
$100 or more per month
Simply not going to happen. I'd probably end up bouncing the payment back through guilt (I won't). This is simply implausible, but if you made a one month go of it and then went to a lower tier (NOT THE LOWEST ONE), I'd be fine with that and would genuinely give you a half hour of my undivided attention (I have never managed to only talk to someone for half an hour, it'll drag on). In all seriousness, I'd happily do a consultancy Skype or phonecall for that.  I don't claim to have all the answers, but I know some bits, and if you needed industry advice or a chat about stuff that's relevant to the work I'd done before then deffo let's do that. 
Owned
$1,000 or more per month
Do this for six months and I'll do you. This tier is mainly to encourage Barry Dodds to start saving.  


(I won't actually do anyone and don't even consider clicking it) 

Indecent Proposal
$15,000 or more per month
Ok I might do you. Minimum three year contract and even then I only said MIGHT.


I've not done any of these tiers properly at all have I? I said it wouldn't work. I'm basically self-sabotaging from the inside.

Goals
500 – reached! patrons
When I reach 500 Patrons I will RUN OFF WITH ALL THE MONEY YOU FOOLS. By the time you realise, I will be on a beach in San Jose making 20%... (this is a joke, I can't think of a goal, I'll be doing the same stupid workload no matter how many I get. Which is hardly an incentive.  I MEANT TO SAY I WILL RETIRE).
1 of 1
Hello there. How are you? Me, I am fine.

Anyway, it was only a matter of time before this became a thing, and your main job is going to be proving me wrong in my assertion that it’s a bad move. Although if you don't prove me wrong I will REALLY sulk. I have argued over Patreon for about two years now, and I have finally run out of excuses.

If you don’t know what Patreon is (if you do then you can skip this paragraph, although you may be risking missing a brilliant joke), then it is a platform where creators (me) can fund their work directly with their audience (you). You pledge to make a monthly payment (some people do it per item, but that would bankrupt you with this page) to fund the creator’s independent work. It is up to you how much you wish to pledge. Some of this work will still be available to the genuine public, but patrons will get it earlier, and some of it will only be available to patrons. Sorry there was no joke in the paragraph.

You may know that I have been creating online content in a variety of forms and guises since 2007, and that I’ve slowly shifted all my creative output to this method. You can find out all about this at ianboldsworth.co.uk, but it wasn’t until 2015 that I had the courage/front to attempt to monetise it, with the rewards based donations system of The ParaPod Podcast. I then got cocky and tried it again with The Mental Podcast, but for my next project I am struggling to see how that can be a thing. To be perfectly honest I am struggling with my next project full stop, as I appear to be having a, some would say long overdue, crisis of confidence. Actually, crisis might be a bit strong, but it isn’t charging into my work portfolio as quickly or confidently as previous stuff.

The project is called 4000 Words and is an ongoing podcast series of short stories and I’ve presently written 4.5 of them which is pathetic (my target for now was 20). Now, this Patreon is not going to be exclusively for that, but it is my main starting point. It occurred to me that in all my previous work I have rarely been transparent about the actual creative process until after the event, and even then only on a very basic level. There is something about the Patreon format however, which – I think – might facilitate that.

I am basically allowing you in on the creating bit, you’ll get everything before everyone else, including the RSS for the demo recordings of the stories as they arrive (I suspect some of these will end up being the final released episodes). My plan, such as it is, is to write on Patreon pretty much every day, be it blog posts, bits of the stories (you’ll definitely be getting the stuff I end up binning too), just a stream of the process. This is how I’ll fund 4000 Words. There’ll be audio blog posts, even if that’s me just grabbing the guitar and singing a song before bedtime (I have made up my own chords and manipulate them for every song, you’ll spot that quick), and posts about other projects including The ParaPod Movie and The Mental Podcast 2 (another one languishing in development hell, but there is a reason for that).

Look, I am basically letting you in on the stuff that I only usually show to friends. I’ve only got about four friends, so maybe my Patreon is you paying to be my friend. Maybe I should be paying you. I am being facetious of course, but genuinely, I am really tired of Twitter, and it’s vague, weird, living your life in public feel, and I think this is potentially a way for me to overshare in the same way I sometimes do on Twitter, but without the cloak of mystery. On the work front, I like the symbiotic thing between audience and creator that has been present in all my work, it’s the main reason I’ve avoided sponsorship on stuff – I don’t want to feel that I’m selling you out. So, I am finally prostituting my art, but directly to the audience.

The posts will start the second just one person pledges and will continue until you have all shook your heads and walked away. I need to go and think of some tiers now. And they keep telling me to do a video.  That’s going to throw my ego into crisis.

Thanks for reading, thanks for the support (with or without pledging – but people that pledge are MORE SPECIAL TO ME)

IB xxx
ianboldsworth.co.uk

Recent posts by Ian Boldsworth

Tiers
Skinflints
$1 or more per month
I'd rather you just threw it in a field.  A sarcastic pledge that is.
Non-Commitals
$5 or more per month
Look.  I do appreciate that.  It's going to look awful if it's just you pledging but if there's a few of you then that's not so bad. But just so you know I have monthly outgoings of £40 that are just to charities and I get NOTHING back from them.  But I don't talk about it. I'm actually trying to work out the best way to cancel some of the direct debits without them noticing.  Probably do it at Christmas when people are giving more to them.
Kindly Folk
$10 or more per month
Ok, that is actually kind.  Now we are getting to the point where I do appreciate it properly and I feel a bit bad about getting cross with the lower tiers.  That might be all they can afford and I shouldn't shout at them. But I do prefer you.
Middle Class
$20 or more per month
No I prefer you now. Although it is a bit dependant on what you actually make.  Like, if you are a millionaire then you have no business slumming it in this tier, but for normal people I would say that is well generous and I would actually phone you up.  I'm not even messing. Only for about ten minutes but what a five minutes that would be. We'd have a right laugh in that two minutes.
Ultras
$50 or more per month
I'll give you my email address.  I honestly will. You will get the most direct way of contacting me in real life and I almost always reply to emails eventually. I'll deffo reply to the first one. Hang on, you're only going to do it for one month aren't you?
Ultra Plus
$75 or more per month
I don't think anyone can afford this.  Thing is, I know most of my fans.  They haven't got money like that. I'll be honest, my descriptions are just making me laugh at the moment so I keep adding more.  Although weirdly for this one I am starting to think I should add something genuine.  You'll obviously get my email address and I'll obviously phone you up, but what else? Skype or something? My internet is poor but we can give it a go? (NO KISSING)
Official friend of Ian in real life
$100 or more per month
Simply not going to happen. I'd probably end up bouncing the payment back through guilt (I won't). This is simply implausible, but if you made a one month go of it and then went to a lower tier (NOT THE LOWEST ONE), I'd be fine with that and would genuinely give you a half hour of my undivided attention (I have never managed to only talk to someone for half an hour, it'll drag on). In all seriousness, I'd happily do a consultancy Skype or phonecall for that.  I don't claim to have all the answers, but I know some bits, and if you needed industry advice or a chat about stuff that's relevant to the work I'd done before then deffo let's do that. 
Owned
$1,000 or more per month
Do this for six months and I'll do you. This tier is mainly to encourage Barry Dodds to start saving.  


(I won't actually do anyone and don't even consider clicking it) 

Indecent Proposal
$15,000 or more per month
Ok I might do you. Minimum three year contract and even then I only said MIGHT.


I've not done any of these tiers properly at all have I? I said it wouldn't work. I'm basically self-sabotaging from the inside.