Ken Doll In Hide is creating parody songs
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Content Cuck
$1 or more per month 26 patrons
At this level, I'll let you send me song ideas to leech off of and ultimately get credit for #itsjustbusiness #thanksbro


You'll also get to hear some Patreon exclusive original songs that may or may not end up on a future compact disc so you won't even need to buy the thing if it ever comes out #addedvalue


Of course, the TDS subreddit is already full of great free fan content.  You could just say "fuck it" and save yourself the $1.00

Warehouse Tourist
$5 or more per month 3 patrons
It's take your patrons to work day!  In addition to the $1 rewards, members of this tier will get to see how their sausage is made.  You'll have access to unreleased song clips and sneak peeks at the many business opportunities I'm working on at any given moment.  If enough of you tell me something is a bad investment, I'll throw it on the dumpster fire out back.


Of course, you might not know that much about gimp suits, beanies or str8 fire.  You could just leave it to the professionals and save yourself the extra $4.00

Red Carpet Premiere Swanky Fuck
$10 or more per month 3 patrons
My top business advisors have informed me that the best way to increase #profits is to start charging people for stuff they used to get for free #2dollarsforpopcornbutterwtfbro


In addition to the $5 rewards, members of this tier will be the first to hear completed songs that I have squirreled away for the sole purpose of squeezing a few extra bucks out of them.  

By shelling out this extra dough, you don't have to be the little guy who gets screwed over.  You can be the middle guy who gets screwed over instead.


Of course, you could just wait a few weeks like everyone else and save yourself the extra $5.

VIP Mail-Order Hoarder / Pim Tool Editor
$20 or more per month 2 patrons
In addition to the $10 rewards, members of this tier will receive actual packages in the mail.  Unless you don't want them, but then when why would you give me an extra $10 a month you silly goose? 


These packages will include a mixture of product prototypes (with instructions), postcards of Pim Tool and I in exotic locations, personal letters, horror stories about dating a horse girl, original art, poster prints, mixtapes (BONUS TRACKS?), etc.  


I promise the packaging won't be too weird.  I'll mail them out near the beginning of each month, right after those sweet, sweet payments have processed.  You might wanna start thinking about where you're going to hide your new stash of inflatable gimp correspondence now.  Fuck I hope one of you signs up for this.  #snailmailshitposting


Award-wanting journalist @Pim_Tool is very unbiased and always looking for new celebs to interview on twitter with the #hardhittingquestions  He and I are pretty close so if there's a thread you think needs pulling, I think I could work something out.


I should also mention that parody song suggestions from VIP Mail-Order Hoarders will almost certainly be made because I need your money and I'll be afraid to offend you.


Of course, amateur journalists are a dime a dozen these days and if your song idea is good I'll likely end up doing it at some point anyway.  So unless you want a bunch of goofy shit mailed to you, you could just save yourself the extra $10.00

Tiers
Content Cuck
$1 or more per month 26 patrons
At this level, I'll let you send me song ideas to leech off of and ultimately get credit for #itsjustbusiness #thanksbro


You'll also get to hear some Patreon exclusive original songs that may or may not end up on a future compact disc so you won't even need to buy the thing if it ever comes out #addedvalue


Of course, the TDS subreddit is already full of great free fan content.  You could just say "fuck it" and save yourself the $1.00

Warehouse Tourist
$5 or more per month 3 patrons
It's take your patrons to work day!  In addition to the $1 rewards, members of this tier will get to see how their sausage is made.  You'll have access to unreleased song clips and sneak peeks at the many business opportunities I'm working on at any given moment.  If enough of you tell me something is a bad investment, I'll throw it on the dumpster fire out back.


Of course, you might not know that much about gimp suits, beanies or str8 fire.  You could just leave it to the professionals and save yourself the extra $4.00

Red Carpet Premiere Swanky Fuck
$10 or more per month 3 patrons
My top business advisors have informed me that the best way to increase #profits is to start charging people for stuff they used to get for free #2dollarsforpopcornbutterwtfbro


In addition to the $5 rewards, members of this tier will be the first to hear completed songs that I have squirreled away for the sole purpose of squeezing a few extra bucks out of them.  

By shelling out this extra dough, you don't have to be the little guy who gets screwed over.  You can be the middle guy who gets screwed over instead.


Of course, you could just wait a few weeks like everyone else and save yourself the extra $5.

VIP Mail-Order Hoarder / Pim Tool Editor
$20 or more per month 2 patrons
In addition to the $10 rewards, members of this tier will receive actual packages in the mail.  Unless you don't want them, but then when why would you give me an extra $10 a month you silly goose? 


These packages will include a mixture of product prototypes (with instructions), postcards of Pim Tool and I in exotic locations, personal letters, horror stories about dating a horse girl, original art, poster prints, mixtapes (BONUS TRACKS?), etc.  


I promise the packaging won't be too weird.  I'll mail them out near the beginning of each month, right after those sweet, sweet payments have processed.  You might wanna start thinking about where you're going to hide your new stash of inflatable gimp correspondence now.  Fuck I hope one of you signs up for this.  #snailmailshitposting


Award-wanting journalist @Pim_Tool is very unbiased and always looking for new celebs to interview on twitter with the #hardhittingquestions  He and I are pretty close so if there's a thread you think needs pulling, I think I could work something out.


I should also mention that parody song suggestions from VIP Mail-Order Hoarders will almost certainly be made because I need your money and I'll be afraid to offend you.


Of course, amateur journalists are a dime a dozen these days and if your song idea is good I'll likely end up doing it at some point anyway.  So unless you want a bunch of goofy shit mailed to you, you could just save yourself the extra $10.00