maroon_sweater

is creating terrible stories

Select a membership level

The Tiny Guilt-Trip

$1
per month
You want me to feel bad but you're not, like, super willing to commit to the bit. I will think of you every time I eke out ten words and delete them a week later.
  • General Support

The Cuddly Cats

$2
per month
I will take and send you one (1) exclusive just-for-you original cat picture.

I will inevitably spend several minutes cuddling them, so rest assured the knowledge I'm abandoning my true artistic duties will weigh on me.
  • General Support
  • One Cat Picture

The Conscience-Scraping Sketch

$3.50
per month
I will draw you something of your choosing (within the bounds of good taste and propriety) on the back of a 3x5 index card with a ballpoint pen and send you a picture of the result.

I will do this instead of writing.
  • General Support
  • Index Card Drawing

2

patrons

$3

per month

About maroon_sweater

“If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.” -Dorothy Parker

Nobody shot me when I was young and I reject Strunk and White, so there's very little you can do for me now except leave me to my miserable compulsion.

Giving me money will not motivate me to write more or faster, but it will make me feel guilty.

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