Parenting who is right

Parenting today is very spirited topic for parents. There are many new fads when it comes to parenting. Many people have thoughts on how you should parent. Parenting is becoming a competitive world to others. Who is right or wrong? Is there a magic book on it?

There are many books on this subject. People who never had kids think they are experts, other parents think they are experts, kids think they are an expert and I think I am an expert. Who is right? I don’t think everyone is totally wrong or right. It is like golf; four people tee off and they hit four different drives. One may use an Iron, one a Driver, one a 3 Wood and one uses their 5 wood. They all go different directions and distances. But when you get to the green you all may end up with a par, but you all played the whole differently. That could be the same with parenting.

I like to talk about parenting since I have two grown kids and two teenagers. It is fun listening to other people say how they would raise our boys. Everyone has a different style. Even my single friends who never had kids before think their way is the only way, but they don’t live our lives every day. 

Every kid is unique for sure. Boys are different then girls. Like my boys at home live for Xbox where I doubt most girls do. Some may but not as many as boys.

When talking to others about parenting it can become a heated subject to some for sure. No one wants to be told they are parenting wrong or their views are not right. Show me a book that says someone views or thoughts are wrong. 

I like looking at successful adults and how their parents raised them. A lot of them were brought up with a limit on screen time. They were encouraged to play sports and join clubs in schools. They were encouraged to play with positive kids that helped them grow and not toxic friends. 

But it takes a community to help raise your kids. They get influenced by many different people. Who are you bringing around your kids? Are they good influences? It also takes both parents to be a 100% supportive of the plan for their kids or it is hard to work. 

Here are some of the things we do with our teenagers;

We are not 100% successful on these and they all don’t work for us. But we keep trying because we believe it is right for our boys.

- We try to limit their Screen time with the Xbox, Cell Phones and TV time each day. This is a challenge for sure. We hear things like I need my phone for photos I took during class to do my homework. But then you go in their room and they are watching a you tube video. LOL

- We try to encourage them not to play with toxic friends that don’t encourage them to grow as a teenager.

- We have a family mission statement of what we feel is right for our family. It has in it a family board or card game day.

- We give the boys daily chores. They do them about 70% of the time. Our fault for not making them do it 100%? But we hear many good excuses.

- The boys must save 25% of all money they get as gifts or from a job. That money goes into a Brokerage account that they pick their own stocks to buy. Then when they hit college time, they use that money for college expenses.

- Our boys are told they will pay for their own college expenses.

- We talk to them about different degrees. We hope they don’t go for the feel-good ones like Music, Food and others that seems to just give kids college debt but not many career options. I know of kids that went for Music to Art and they are living at home after getting a college degree, they have no good paying job but they do have a huge college debt.

- I ask our boys to read a book from my success book case. These are on subjects they don’t learn about in school. I wish my parents would have had me read them. Only an hour a day they are asked to do it. Doesn’t always hardly happen.

- I ask our boys to do programming on free websites each day also for an hour. There are many free websites for them to use like Code Academy, Khan academy, Edx and others. But again, it hardly happens. We hear many excuses.

- We try to have family learning time each night. We have taught them things like finances, health, bible, success, expenses, investments, debt free living and many other topics. We also taught them how to write a check to balance a check book. We read books together to watching you tube videos or TEDx talks. 

- We try to get them to eat healthy. This doesn’t always happen either. We probably need to quit buying junk food or pop. A friend of mine when his kids were young, they only had healthy options in their kitchen for their family to eat. 

- Teach them about the importance of family and staying married. That friends come and go but family should always be there. Your spouse should be your best friend in life.

When we hear excuses, we remind the kids of the book we read on “Excuses Be Gone” by Wayne Dwyer. A good book to read if you haven’t. We read it as a family.

I like it when people tell us I am wrong on my thoughts. They are my thoughts and beliefs from my 53 years of living. From books I have read. From people I have talked to. From kids I have talked with. So, if you don’t like my thoughts on my blogs that is your choice. No one is going to agree with everyone’s views in life. I have many blogs I like to follow but I don’t agree with them all. But overall, I do or I wouldn’t read them. I like to debate topics with people in reason. Some have no reason. Those people I say they need to “Wake Up”. 

I hope and pray about our four kids and that they have successful, healthy and enjoyable lives as adults. What ever path they choose. We hope they will have less pot holes in their lives that we hit.  We want them to have more of everything then we had because we love them all. 

Here is a positive quote I like; “Remind yourself daily that there is no way to happiness; rather, happiness is the way.” ― Wayne W. Dyer, Change Your Thoughts - Change Your Life: Living the Wisdom of the Tao

Let me know your thoughts about this blog and let me know of others you would like me to do in the future. I feel we can all learn from each other. That is why I am in the helping people retire early, enjoy life more and be more successful. Also, please see my Disclaimer page.

Don’t give up on your dreams; don’t let others talk you out of your dreams. Make your dreams happen. Make it happen today.

Let me know your thoughts or ideas. 

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