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For the first time ever, I have a fellow gay performer on the show, Johnny Hazzard. Johnny was a prolific performer and still appears in great and arousing movies; but more recently of the mainstream sort, like his great movie about two gay brothers, Tiger Orange

Johnny and I talk about our era of adult films, which overlapped and, um, let's say intersected in the scene we filmed together. We spend a lot of time talking about those eras, trying to express how complicated it was, even though people want to simplify it into purely negative and positive pictures.

Our free and easy way of talking about sex might help indicate to you what it's like for so many of us when we're on set. On a good day, there's a friendliness and ease around bodies and sex that can't  be found almost anywhere else.. This was so much fun, and I'm so excited to finally share an episode with one of my cumrades with you. Yeah, I said cumrades.

We talk

  • Why Johnny left adult
  • The ways being in adult can heal and harm us
  • Homosexuality and brotherhood
  • The difference between our eras of adult and the new OnlyFans era
  • Our first experiences going to set
  • Why I idolized performers before I started and why Johnny didn't
  • Gay adult performer suicides
  • The skills you can get from being in porn and how they're ignored by so many of us
  • Why "normal"  jobs - including mainstream acting - are worse than adult.
  • Why hating sex workers is the same impulse as homophobia
  • How much performers get paid


• For more on Johnny, check out the trailer for his new movie, Run.  Here's an in-depth interview with him in OUT Magazine. And of course, you can always watch his movies, which you can link to via, you know, Google.

• I wrote a very short essay about my scene with Johnny (and four other guys!) for the late, great ManhuntDaily  back in 2011. Don't open that link at your stuffy office job, gents.

• Oh Zak Spears (pictured below), I'm still hopelessly devoted to you, and so is Johnny, apparently. And a calvalcade of performers and adjacent folks - Chi Chi Larue, Bobby Clark (scroll all the way down to see a photo of that cute as a button fellow), Brenn Wyson, Girth Brooks (more on him below), and more.

• VIDEO HOME SYSTEM. Duh, Conner and Johnny. VHS is Video Home System.

• If you'd like to read about my experiences of working with gay for pay performer Girth Brooks, I wrote an essay about it - "Gay For Pay" - which appeared in Best Gay Stories 2012.  You can also read "Gay For Pay Part 2" here (with a slightly NSFW pic! Fair warning).

I wrote a bit on retiring from "the industry" and how not to do it are few years back. 

• And I also wrote on the false question of Why Do Gay Porn Stars Kill Themselves? in an essay with that name. 

• Okay, almost done promoting my essays, but they really fit here! My essay, "What I Want To Know Is Why You Hate Porn Stars" remains one of the most popular things I've ever written.

Until next time, you wonderful people,


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