57 Ways To Kill a Man
#42: Offer him a pheromone-soaked towel at the pool. Hide his EpiPen. Unleash your specially-bred miniature swarm of honeybees from your handbag apiary. #25: Suggest a picnic in the woods at least two days’ hike away from the closest hospital. Strew rusty nails across the path to the clearing. Somehow forget to boil the water you use to clean the puncture wounds. Tetanus and infection will set in shortly. #21: Flavor his favorite dish with a hearty sprinkling of powdered arsenic. Assure him that you can’t share because you just visited the dentist for a deep cleaning. #18: While on vacation in Paris and climbing the eight flights of stairs to the tiny apartment you’ve rented for the duration, trip him just before you reach the top stair. Note: Make sure there isn’t anyone else behind you to break his eight-story fall. #6: A derringer and a dark alley can be a girl’s best friends. #1: Make him love you to the point of distraction, and let natural selection run its course.