Me (taking some Vitamin C tabs) I think I'm fighting off something. I shouldn't go to the gym or push it too hard lest I get more sick.
Also Me: Ohm'EFFIN gawd the last time you went to the gym was New Years Eve and you totally half-assed it. It's been like FOUR days. This is how it starts, getting out of habits, getting out of shape and back sliding. You haven't even intermittent fasted correctly lately so this is pretty bad. Are you coughing? Are you dying? No?! Then you're just being lazy. Do you remember NYE?! Uhm, you had a margarita that I'm pretty sure had a syrup in it. That's like 1,000 calories or something. And I think you ate a dessert that night too. Like, you're going to weigh so much after today. And you're just taking a huge step back since vacation.
Me (realizing a few hours later) - It's January 2nd. I went to the gym Saturday. It's been one day that I took a rest day. I'll still get my steps in walking --- just no major cardio. Chill the hell out.
*walks on my home gym just in case to meet in the middle*
Yep, no one is more critical of me than me. Suck it, haters. No one is more self-aware and self-depreciating to me than I. I'm like the Skynet of me. Want to try to make me feel bad about something? Beat ya' to it and then some. Thanks anxiety disorder, you're a real frenemy.