My favourite things at the moment are the cool secret ways we are building to draw attention to our hierarchies of cultural power so we can pretend we're rejecting them while secretly reinforcing them. Like in a bunch of corporate environments it's noticeably rarer for senior people to ask young women to stay late into the night if they say they have other commitments, where men get told to harden the fuck up. Looks like protection and kindness, (preventing personal upset and burnout) ends up a hard cap on progress and integration into the prevailing culture. Not that you'd necessarily want to integrate into the corporate culture, it's a shit one. But if that's the game you want to play it's frustrating to have the 'real boys' refuse to tackle you the way they do their other teammates. Sometimes taking the hit is a prerequisite for playing the game the way it's played. Which is not to say that's a good game, or a desirable game, or a game that leads to desirable health outcomes. But it seems to be the game that's popular in your town or pays better or whatever. It's the game you want to be allowed to play, anyway. Your other option is to try to change the game, but the most effective way to do that is to get everyone's explicit buy in. Not let the boys continue to play tackle-rugby while everyone else is insisting on touch. I realise this original metaphor has now gone into a sub-clause metaphor but I'm awake at 6am and writing an ill-advised consideration of the nature of empathy and identity based protectionism, so the mixed metaphors are the least of your problems. (I have 99 problems, and a mixed metaphor is one) Chiz P.s. Noticing and calling this out is literally the least I can do to fix the problem, but I have other stuff to do today which is more important to me, so I'd rather articulate my discomfort in a space where there's a chance it'll marginally influence the perspective of people who actually mostly already agree with me on basic principles, and that feels almost like action - than consider what action I can actually take to change this state of affairs.) P.p.s I don't know if this is intersectional feminism, using feminism as a slightly less loaded parallel for the super loaded issue that I'm picking my way through. Is it?