How was my day?
Yesterday I talked to one autistic person that was cutting themself just to try to feel better and another autistic person that had just returned from the hospital after trying to commit suicide two days earlier.

This is my reality now. Did I ever imagine my life would lead to me to this? Not in the slightest. If I had, I might have tried to prepare more, like taking some psychology courses or something. But instead I feel like I'm making all of this up as best I can as I go... winging it.

Do I regret it? Do I wish I didn't have to do this all the time now? No, of course not. There's no place I'd rather be. These kids need me even if all I can really do is offer some kindness, some understanding and some reassuring words.

Some people are surprised at how much I know and remember about all of them... over 6500 players now. But they wouldn't be so surprised if they knew just how much I cared. You remember the small things about the people you care for.

They are such great people (the kids and adults alike)... so very kind, thoughtful and generous. They don't deserve such difficult lives.

I'm not going to lie though, as much as I hope I am there for every single one of those talks, because that's where I need to be, and I hope I never miss a single one ever... it is emotionally and physically draining. That's probably why I slept for over 9 hours last night.

So how was your day?

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