When people are scared of your face even at Halloween, what will they think during the other seasons of the year?  I'm an alien with a disfigured face.  How often have I heard people laugh at my face or say I look weird or scary?

And so, as what I pretend is a service to them, I wear a mask.  It looks fleshy and "normal" and white, and I pretend that choosing to be white does not make me a racist, privileged, evil person.

But when I am real, my face looks like I was born of a trash heap.  Because I was.  When I am me, you'll see the people I love shmeared all over my face.  My skin bleeds color.  My eyes leak.  The tears stain my clothes in blues and greens and pink and black.

I do take my mask off often enough.  When it's safe.  When I trust that people want to see my face.  I believe it is a beautiful face.  But for now, I save it for holy days like Halloween, and others.  Ojala, that those days become more numerous.  And that I may catch more courage to take my mask off.