Around my 28th birthday I got a computer and started looking for information about cross dressing.
I started talking to other people about my “problem” asking for information about where I could get clothing and wigs and how I could meet other people who felt the same way. Around this time things came to a head for me mentally.
One evening in a fit of rage I stormed out of the house and started driving, eventually ending up at a local river. I walked to the edge and prepared to jump (I can't swim) thinking it would be better if I end it now and save my family from the embarrassment of finding out I was a cross dresser?..... if only I could look like a woman all of the time? If only I could get help. And with that thought running through my head I turned around and walked back to the car. I sat on the bonnet and started to cry, then screamed at the top of my voice, “I AM A TRANSSEXUAL !” I could not go on living like this I had to take action otherwise I would try to hurt myself again. So I made a decision to get help, to go and see a doctor.
Having made your first appointment with a GP and getting a referral to a psychiatrist, your doctor may start you on H.R.T. Your first visit to a psychiatrist may take weeks or months. It all depends on how busy they are. At this stage you will have to start to make choices about who you tell about your transition. and this will be difficult. You WILL eventually have to tell your employer, your friends and your family. It goes without saying, these conversations will not be easy. Expect hundreds of questions as people will be confused and curious.
In Victoria an employer can't discriminate against you because of your sexuality or perceived gender. When I came out at my work I had an hour long meeting with my boss. I explained to him what I planned to do. All the time he sat there with a stunned expression on his face, Poor feller.
The next people to tell was my family. This was the conversation I was dreading. When telling people about my situation I have always believed honesty is the best action. So with shaking hands, I wrote a letter to my parents and siblings telling them of my plan to start living as a woman. At first my mum was confused and did not believe me and my dad refused to see me dressed as a woman. In time (and it took time) they accepted me. What did surprise me was my brother and sister, to this day the both of them still don’t accept what I have done, but at least they talk to me....sometimes.