Rough Day. Portrait Painting in oils to help self-medicate against life's bumpy road.
I can't really share everything... But today was rough. My hubby has epilepsy and after a really long time without a seizure, he had one. There are circumstances surrounding the seizure that are complicating our life and making things difficult. And while those circumstances are frustrating, it's the sense of loss that is the hardest to be at peace with. I believe there is a master plan, where this event and all the ripples around it are woven into our life's tapestry so intricately that in hindsight, when stepping back to see the whole, I will have understanding and maybe even appreciation. But right now I am left holding a tangled bundle of thread. It's chaotic jumble driving my order seeking mind mad. So, this evening I painted. This painting was started as a demo piece from a 2 day workshop with one of my wonderful Patrons and her father. My demo paintings are quite rough, sometimes even just plain bad. When teaching, the demo painting serves as a guinea pig to explain technique, and shortly afterwards, it's purpose ceases. But tonight, I needed to fix something. Tonight I needed to exercise control. To zone out and not think about this other mess, but focus on the one I can resolve. So here it is, not finished, but she has passed through the neglected demo-stage and now resides in the "work in progress" stage. I can't control everything. But this art thing, it helps me breathe. I would be a mess without it.