I think I've mentioned a couple of times these past years about my struggle of agoraphobia. Even though I managed to combat some of it, allowing me to go to stores and such, the fear of traveling has been stuck with me for a long time. Especially the fear of traveling by public transportation.
Before I moved here, I had already taken the train a couple of times and the bus once. That was huge for me, a very emotional time. So I started sketching on this but so much happened during that time that I just never got time to finish it up and eventually I even forgot about it.
But now that I have moved here and has done even more progress, I wanted to draw something for it again, remembered this sketch and decided to recycle it.
I've lived here for less than two weeks. I would have NEVER imagine that I would have taken the bus, train and subway within TWO weeks! In fact, I was afraid that I'd just isolate myself like I tend to do when I have moved. But no. As stupid as it sounds, Pokémon Go was actually a motivation and reward system for me to get out from my apartment from day one. Not gonna lie though, my friends who are now around the same area as me are certainly the biggest motivation for me, the biggest support and the reason to why I've taken public transportation already. But Pokémon Go has filled in for them when they haven't been around (they kinda got their own lives to live as well x'D).
Pokémon Go has helped me to go out on my own. I just have this really fun reason to go outside every single day and every now and then I don't just look up from the screen, but I really look up and take in the surroundings. The other day, I was with my friend as she was donating blood, I was playing Pokémon Go at the same time so I'd have something else to focus on when the blood stuff was going on (you can poke me with needles and I'm fine, but me watching when it's done to others... oh godness), but I also took a moment to look out from the window. We were in the central parts of Stockholm (capital of Sweden, I live in the outer parts of Stockholm now) and on the six'th floor. It's actually quite a nice place. It was in the evening as well so I have this nice photo in my head of the all those roofs with this lovely orange hue.
Sometimes, even though I look up from the screen often so I don't walk into things, I just get into the game and all of a sudden I'll just stop and realise how far I have come. Physically and mentally.
I feel free. And that feels... the best.
Don't give up.
And also, don't feel bad about using something like a game as a tool for your progress. I caught Pokémon in the very core of the capital of Sweden. Just gonna repeat the fact that I have social anxiety disorder and agoraphobia. It was absolutely amazing. Turns out Pokémon is stronger than anxiety.