In January of 2017, I decided that it was time to tell my story. I had been dealing with a narcissistic emotional abuser for years and didn't know it. Even now, I cringe using that label.
I know I'm not the only one.
I built my website myself, designed my logo and created "Synclair Stephens".
In April, after watching and being drawn into HBO's Big Little Lies, I wrote an essay and was published on Romper under Anonymous. My piece compared my abuse to the character Celeste. While I have been published in several well known publications using my legal name, this was a first as Synclair and even though the essay was published as anonymous, what mattered to me was that my story was out there.
There is nothing simple about abuse. Some things are "cookie cutter", but the beast it is affects women from various backgrounds. Celeste, on HBO's Big Little Lies, is a fictional and wealthy woman face horrifying physical, emotional and sexual abuse. Her money did nothing but enable her to begin a life quicker than those not as financially secure (especially when financial abuse plays such an important role).
I understand where you're coming from, but why should I support you on Patreon? There are so many other women going through the same thing and not asking for money.
It has taken me quite a bit of time to publish this Patreon page. I had some pushback from a GoFund me page and didn't want to send the wrong message.
Like many women in this situation, I have been through it the last couple years and more recently as I have fought to make changes, things have really been shaken up!
- I have filed Domestic Incident reports and know many of the local police by name.
- With the help of my friends, I have called shelters in my area. I know what's out there should I need to get out quickly again. I am currently in the middle of the divorce agreement, so there is light at the end of my tunnel.
- I have secured one job and have had a couple other interviews and interviews coming up.
Part of what I wanted to do with the blog was "write my way out" - publish articles and operate in the same professional manner I do as a writer when not writing as Synclair.
I will continue to write and pitch articles under this pen name, with publishing as my end goal.
Your sponsorship will enable me to keep the website up and spend a little more time working on the blog posts and pitches to major publications.
I will share the news with you here and look forward to reaching more women and even sharing their stories. Domestic Abuse, Emotional Abuse, Financial Abuse are all things I have been touching upon my sharing my own story and will continue to touch up on as I share the stories of other women (and men).